10 Things Some Men Do To 'Out Man' Each Other.

10 things some men do to 'out man' each other

#1 - Boast about how rare they like their steak.

#2 - Order the hottest curry on the menu and pretend to enjoy it.

#3 - Make as many disparaging comparisons between rugby and football as they can anytime either sport is mentioned.

#4 - Insist they love dogs but hate cats.

#5 - Detail what they would do if somebody broke into their house.

#6 - Tone down their posh accent.

#7 - Boast how quickly they could grow a beard 'if they wanted to'. 

#8 - Refuse to admit liking any alcoholic beverages that women are commonly known to enjoy. 

#9 -  Claim their childhood karate lessons have left them ready for combat.

#10 - Talk about 'that fight' they had in high school.

Any I missed?

 

The Human Face Of The Refugee Crisis.

The Human Face Of The Refugee Crisis 

Unless you have been living in a box or under a rock you will have undoubtedly heard about the humungous scale of the refugee crisis sweeping through Europe, mostly from Syria. There have been so many tragedies happening to these people that it would be near impossible to write about all of them. Therefore, I want to talk about one of the positives that has come from the situation. 

One of the main positives that I have noticed is that much of the mainstream media are finally treating refugees like human beings. Instead of the constant bigoted, inflammatory nonsense about how, 'PEOPLE ARE COMING HERE TO STEAL ALL YOUR JOBS', I'm actually seeing lots of reporting and news stories that are instead focusing on stories of the difficulties that these people are going through as well as ways in which people are trying to help them and suggestions on what we can do to help. 

How have we finally got to this point? I think that part of it is that the crisis is now so huge that people and the media have had to face more truths about what is actually happening. The situation in Syria not getting any better, charities not having enough resources and people getting increasingly desperate to find somewhere safe to live have all contributed to the truth of the situation becoming more obvious. The other reason is the story of a little boy who drowned on a beach, Alan Kurdi, going viral. The incredibly powerful and upsetting image from the story gave many people a focus for compassion and empathy over the situation. 

Obviously, not enough is being done by our countries to help these people. However, some of the truthful and sensitive reporting towards this crisis is a step in the right direction for the media. 

 

Notes To My Teenage Self.

Notes To My Teenage Self

#1 - That album you record when you're 15 is diabolically awful. Keep a copy for banter though.

#2 - Just because long hair suited Kurt Cobain it definitely doesn't mean it suits you.

#3 - The goth phase is just a phase. 

#4 - Jack still puts up with you sometimes for some reason.

#5 - You're not very good at handling a litre of Tesco value vodka.

#6 - The aforementioned Tesco value vodka my cause some minor indiscretions.

#7 - You eventually learn to value your health and fitness.

#8 - Stop buying baggy jeans and unfunny slogan t-shirts. It's not a good look.

#9 - The amount of hassle you give your teachers will become wonderfully ironic in a few years.

#10 - You're right about Welshpool but you're wrong about the rest of the world.

#11 - I'm afraid you become the type of Guardian reading liberal that you like to mock. 

#12 - You actually learn to get on with your siblings, even Theo! 

#13 - Copious amounts of Lynx doesn't count as a wash.

#14 - Every experience, good and bad, is a story to tell.

#15 - All things get better eventually. 

4 Stages of Writing a Novel.

The 4 Stages of Writing a Novel

I am currently in the stages of writing my second novel. My first novel was called 'Little Room on the Landing' and I self published it through a company called Lulu. The book I'm writing at the moment doesn't have a name yet but I am a little over quarter of the way through writing it. I have noticed that the processes (for want of a less pretentious word) that I have been going through are very similar to those experienced when writing my first novel. For me, they seem to go as follows: 

Stage 1 - 0-20,000 words - The happy phase. 

When you first start writing any story you almost always think that you have some sort of great idea or focus. This is why so many people (including me) start writing novels that they will never finish. The one that I am writing at the moment is actually my sixth attempt. The first few thousand words come easily to you and, if you enjoying writing, it is almost a simple pleasure. You can't foresee your project to have any real difficulties and you convince yourself the book will probably be finished in a few months at most. 

  "Well, I haven't ACTUALLY started writing it yet.'

Stage 2 - 20,000-40,000 words - The self deprecating phase.

This is the hardest stage to get through. All of a sudden, your creative juices slow down a little and you question the whole project. This niggling self doubt makes every word more difficult to write and you start wondering if you should just scrap it and wait for a different idea. This is where all those millions of unfinished novels come from. However, as my writing tutor used to tell me, "Just keep writing. Simple."

 "I'll just stick to watching television."

Stage 3 - 40,000-60,000 words - The slog phase.

This is when the whole writing process just seems to slow down. You now believe that the novel will probably get finished but it just seems to be taking so long. Every time you click on 'word count' you can't quite believe that it has only gone up by twelve words. It's not that you're not enjoying it, because you are, it just feels a little painful. A bit like writing uni assignments except you're not hungover in the library at 7AM on the day it's due in. So, actually, nothing like that.

"Only 998 words 'til I hit my 1000 word daily target.'

Stage 4 - 60,000 - 80,000+ words - The great finale phase.

You know when you're running a long distance race and you feel like you're going to die but on the last hundred meters you suddenly feel like you could do it all over again? Well, that's what it feels like when you get to the end of writing a novel. I guess it's like that with many things in life though. You forget what all the fuss was about as soon as it's over. This final sprint to the finish is even better than the start and the happy culmination of many hours of hard work and effort. Then something happens and you think, 'I'll have to write about that.' 

 "I'VE FINISHED IT! I'TS OVER!...anyone?

4 Ways Children Are Put Off Reading.

4 Ways Children Are Put Off Reading

As a primary school teacher, it can be a real struggle to keep children interested in reading. Malorie Blackman, the current children's laureate, promotes 10-minute daily storytelling time in schools. I can say from experience that this time is effective and important in promoting a love of reading in children. Most recently, a group of inquisitive children asking for more details about information on severed heads and barbaric punishments from 'Rotten Romans' by the always brilliant Terry Deary. 

There are many other positive suggestions like this being encouraged to schools and parents. However, here are four problems that I feel are being faced when trying to give children a genuine love for reading. 

#1 - Those awful posters encouraging children to read. 

You remember the ones? The ones that you and your mates would make fun of once before completely ignoring them? The ones that never made you want to pick up a book...ever? The ones that looked like this, 

 
They're just so cheesy. No child over the age of six is ever going to think something like this is 'cool'. Not only that, it sort of feels like a book promoting a celebrity rather than a celebrity promoting a book. 

The ones that aren't celebrity endorsed will often look something like this,



From the generic, 'I didn't have much time to do this so I found a picture of a book on ClipArt and put some WordArt writing over it' school of poster design. Just completely non-effective. 

#2 - Children's books can still be a bit too 'nice'. 

When I was a boy, given the choice between a nice story about a friendly, talking dog or beating up thugs in 'Streets of Rage' on my games console, it was always going to be the thugs. I think we still have this problem today when video games can often have material that is so much more appealing to children than what they find in books.

Luckily, I do feel that there is starting to be more of a shift towards authors writing material for children that is a bit grittier, funnier or gross for children who aren't interested in friendly, talking dogs. Authors such as Morris Gleitzman who have written brilliantly effective children's stories about serious issues.   

"Yeah, who needs Xbox?" Said no child ever.



#3 - A lack of variety in what is considered 'proper reading'. 

Some of my happiest memories of reading as a child are from The Beano comic, superhero comics, Guinness Book of Records and WWF magazine (now WWE). The Beano had genuinely funny humour, superhero comics had complex storylines with a wide vocabulary of language and The Guinness Book of Records was packed full of knowledge. WWF magazine had The Rock but that's probably not as relevant. 

The problem is, I feel many of these would not be considered by adults as quality texts for children. I completely disagree though. If it has good language and is encouraging children to read then it's all good in my books (awful pun). 

The Rock, not an obvious choice for one of my early literary influences.

#4 - Children not being read to enough.

Back to my original point really. If children aren't read to enough then I think they're very unlikely to gain a love of reading. I have great memories of my Dad reading me Goosebumps and my sister reading me bedtime stories. Even if she was just making up a story to go with the pictures because she couldn't be bothered to read the whole thing. 

Traditional and Social Media Reaction to Gaza.

Traditional and Social Media Reaction to Gaza

In general, my Facebook news feed and most of what I have read on Twitter has been pretty condemning of Israeli actions in Gaza since fighting broke out again. Without even giving my own opinion, it is easy to see why this is the case. All you have to do is look at the facts and the numbers being given through traditional media outlets such as the newspapers. The fighting has now left 1,800 Palestinians dead and 64 Israelis killed. This shows us what seems to be an incredibly one-sided war. When you couple this with news of which Palestinians have been killed you can see why the reaction on social media has also been so one-sided. Rather than just military targets being hit there are now more than half a million homeless Palestinians. This shows us that it is ordinary people who are suffering the brunt of the numerous airstrikes. 

In the past, traditional Western media has often been accused of being pro-Isreal and not giving a fair account of what is really happening. However, as shown previously, the numbers tell the true story of the situation in Gaza and it would take an incredible amount of media spin to say otherwise. People have taken the information they have got from traditional media and realised it doesn't tally with the response of most Western governments. They have then used social media to vent their anger and this voice is one that can't be easily ignored. There has even been fairly high profile celebrities voicing their support for Palestine which does give the conflict a wider audience regardless of what you think of mainstream celebrities voicing their political opinions. 

The main problem with the reaction to the conflict on social media? Well, it appears to have had very little, if any, impact on improving the situation for people in Gaza. 1,800 Palestinians are dead and yet Barack Obama has just signed a bill that will give 133 million pounds to Israel for a missile defence system. I'll just let that sink in for a moment. 

We now enter the second day of a ceasefire that has almost no chance of leading to a peaceful outcome. Israel almost definitely won't stop blockading Gaza and Hamas almost definitely won't disarm. This will mean the numbers in traditional media will continue to grow and the voices on social media will continue to get louder. 

As Voltaire said,


   
    

  

Orlando punches Bieber.

Orlando Bloom punches Justin Bieber

If you're one of the few people that hasn't watched the video of this then you can watch it here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSL4nP2uYmM

In possibly one of the greatest moves of his career, Orlando Bloom decided to punch Justin Bieber, therefore becoming one of the most beloved celebrities in Hollywood. This is due to the fact that Bieber is probably one of the most mocked and largely disliked celebrities in the Western world today. Admittedly, Orlando may have upset a few million 'Beliebers' but who wants them anyway?

The fight supposedly occurred after some sort of dispute over Miranda Kerr.

Well, she seems a pretty good reason for a fight so I wont begrudge either man for their decisions.

Orlando can now enjoy millions of men now considering him a bit of a lad as well as the huge number of memes that will probably now be made to commemorate the occasion.  

As for Bieber? Well, his fans will probably feel sorry for him whilst the rest of the world just uses it as yet another excuse to unscrupulously take the piss out of him. However, he is a twenty year old multi-millionaire with a string of beautiful women so I'm sure he will get over whatever a few keyboard warriors have to say about him. 

All in all, don't piss off an Elf.